Many services close for extended periods over the Chistmas-New Year celebrations as I did last year. However, this year I will be on deck counselling in my Melbourne CBD office near the corner of Lonsdale and Swanston Streets and at Burwood East near K-Mart throughout the holiday season. The only exceptions are Chrismas Day, the Boxing Day holiday (Monday 28th December)and New Year's Day.
I take this early opportunity to thank all of you whom I met in counselling for the privilege of working with you. I wish all readers a happy Christmas and New Year.
Thank you.
John Hunter
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
When is a safe area not a safe area?
We all hope bushfires do not wreak the havoc and misery they did last year in Victoria and preparations are the focus of interest in the news.It was my friend who correctly heard for me that authorities do not speak of providing Safe Areas where refugees from future blazes may gather while the flames pass: they speak of only safER areas. I find this dispiriting. Dictionary.com defines this as "to deprive of spirit, hope, enthusiasm, ...(to) discourage; dishearten".
I think we all know that the most we can expect from any institution is the best possible; we cannot expect infallibility. Yielding to fear of legal suit in case a designated area fails to match the ravages of extreme nature on a given day, represents to me government failing to perform its primary duty: to provide support and leadership to those who give it power and authority.
Or should we extend this overcaution to other problematic areas? Should bride and groom more prudently promise to remain faithful "unless I meet someone I find incredibly attractive and can't help myself". We know that best intentions do not always succeed. We cannot know the future; we plan, and the rest is faith, hope and hard work. For mine, there is nothing generous, optimistic or comforting about this legal-speak.
I think we all know that the most we can expect from any institution is the best possible; we cannot expect infallibility. Yielding to fear of legal suit in case a designated area fails to match the ravages of extreme nature on a given day, represents to me government failing to perform its primary duty: to provide support and leadership to those who give it power and authority.
Or should we extend this overcaution to other problematic areas? Should bride and groom more prudently promise to remain faithful "unless I meet someone I find incredibly attractive and can't help myself". We know that best intentions do not always succeed. We cannot know the future; we plan, and the rest is faith, hope and hard work. For mine, there is nothing generous, optimistic or comforting about this legal-speak.
Monday, September 28, 2009
It's All in the Wrist
An Age cartoonist parodying the controversy that follows a public contest like the AFL Grand Final included a quote from the wit Oscar Wilde who quipped in a play on words "It's not whether you win or lose it's how you place the blame".
The blame game in our own lives can stop us facing issues and working on them. Unless someone else is responible for our plight, and unless we can bring them to accept responsibility and act to resolve the conflict, our happiness is really going to be down to how we deal with the situation we find ourselves in.
Our attitude, what we make of a situation, is perhaps the key determinant in how successful we will be in improving our lives. Doing this alone can be hard. Call if you wish a private, confidential conversation with a non-judging, non-blaming, responsive professional.
And hearty congratulations to both teams for a wonderful display of courage and persistence.
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
The blame game in our own lives can stop us facing issues and working on them. Unless someone else is responible for our plight, and unless we can bring them to accept responsibility and act to resolve the conflict, our happiness is really going to be down to how we deal with the situation we find ourselves in.
Our attitude, what we make of a situation, is perhaps the key determinant in how successful we will be in improving our lives. Doing this alone can be hard. Call if you wish a private, confidential conversation with a non-judging, non-blaming, responsive professional.
And hearty congratulations to both teams for a wonderful display of courage and persistence.
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
As Time Goes By
A man rang me this week looking for an appointment about something that had plagued him for a decade. He said his doctor had given him a referral three weeks ago and was embarrassed that he had been so slow in calling.
I told him what I would say to anybody who calls.
Deciding we need to call on someone else for assistance is a big decision. Actually picking up the phone and declaring it to another person is a mighty step, and a bit scary.
We rightly do not give up any part of our independence lightly. We only do so when we are absolutely certain we are stuck and out of ideas and/or that we can't go on like we are any longer.
So, we change when we are ready, not before.
We can sit on problems for decades, sometimes half a lifetime or more.
And when we do move on them and benefit from doing so we tend to berate ourselves by saying such things as "Why didn't I do this years ago?", "I was a fool not to do this earlier". But we did not wait because we were stupid, stubborn or anything else. We did not do it earlier because it was not time, we were still getting ready.
Call me any time you are ready to consider whether the time for talking is now. You will not be pressured.
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
I told him what I would say to anybody who calls.
Deciding we need to call on someone else for assistance is a big decision. Actually picking up the phone and declaring it to another person is a mighty step, and a bit scary.
We rightly do not give up any part of our independence lightly. We only do so when we are absolutely certain we are stuck and out of ideas and/or that we can't go on like we are any longer.
So, we change when we are ready, not before.
We can sit on problems for decades, sometimes half a lifetime or more.
And when we do move on them and benefit from doing so we tend to berate ourselves by saying such things as "Why didn't I do this years ago?", "I was a fool not to do this earlier". But we did not wait because we were stupid, stubborn or anything else. We did not do it earlier because it was not time, we were still getting ready.
Call me any time you are ready to consider whether the time for talking is now. You will not be pressured.
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Rumours and reality
Reality is not as solid as it seems. Scientists will tell you that all knowledge is simply the best explanation to date for the way things are and may change with further data.
Our personal reality is the mental representation we make for ourselves of our world, our relationship to it and the relationships we have with others. We constuct this on the basis of our perceptions, attitudes, emotions and experiences. In the process our mood at the time, recent history, fatigue, diet, sleep, physical fitness and well-being exert an influence.
Our realtity thus made is under daily bombardment by information from newspapers, TV, radio, and now the ubiquitous internet, emails, chat, youtube, twitter and more. Regretably the accuracy of this flood of data varies from the reliable to the speculative, conspiratorial and even deliberately malicious.
It is important we look after our own sanity, protect our feelings and conserve our energy for endeavours we believe worthy of our attention. Family, relationships, work, security, intellectual stimulation and emotional content are our primary responsibility to ourselves and those most important to us. If we tend to these, we are in a healthy position to be effective with others.
Too often we can be drawn into the litany of rumour, speculation, fear-mongering, and tragedy-wallowing beloved of sensationalist producers; and those who mishandle or deliberately abuse the freedom of information and scale of audience the web has brought us. Four Corners (ABC1-TV, Monday 31-8-09) is a case of the latter: conspiracy mongering on a grand scale for those interested in watching when the program's repeat telecast.
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
Our personal reality is the mental representation we make for ourselves of our world, our relationship to it and the relationships we have with others. We constuct this on the basis of our perceptions, attitudes, emotions and experiences. In the process our mood at the time, recent history, fatigue, diet, sleep, physical fitness and well-being exert an influence.
Our realtity thus made is under daily bombardment by information from newspapers, TV, radio, and now the ubiquitous internet, emails, chat, youtube, twitter and more. Regretably the accuracy of this flood of data varies from the reliable to the speculative, conspiratorial and even deliberately malicious.
It is important we look after our own sanity, protect our feelings and conserve our energy for endeavours we believe worthy of our attention. Family, relationships, work, security, intellectual stimulation and emotional content are our primary responsibility to ourselves and those most important to us. If we tend to these, we are in a healthy position to be effective with others.
Too often we can be drawn into the litany of rumour, speculation, fear-mongering, and tragedy-wallowing beloved of sensationalist producers; and those who mishandle or deliberately abuse the freedom of information and scale of audience the web has brought us. Four Corners (ABC1-TV, Monday 31-8-09) is a case of the latter: conspiracy mongering on a grand scale for those interested in watching when the program's repeat telecast.
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Eating Disorders
I have had requests to assist people who have eating problems. These affect brain and body development and present great danger to those affected.
I refer callers and their families when they call to their local doctor for a professional referral. The issue requires training I have not undertaken.
A ready telephone resource is also available with the Eating Disorders Foundation of Victoria (there are branches of the EDF in the Australian capital cities).
Melbourne callers can ring 9885 0318; those outside the metropolitan area call 1300 550 236.
A visit to the Foundation website describes the range of services and other helpful information. Visit:
www.eatingdisorders.org.au
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
I refer callers and their families when they call to their local doctor for a professional referral. The issue requires training I have not undertaken.
A ready telephone resource is also available with the Eating Disorders Foundation of Victoria (there are branches of the EDF in the Australian capital cities).
Melbourne callers can ring 9885 0318; those outside the metropolitan area call 1300 550 236.
A visit to the Foundation website describes the range of services and other helpful information. Visit:
www.eatingdisorders.org.au
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Decision Making: Procrastination can make sense
In recent weeks we were bombarded with reports about Prime Minister Kevin Rudd’s alleged favouring of a Used Car salesman, Treasurer Wayne Swan’s alleged privileged treatment of the salesman, an email which appears to be fake and Opposition Leader Malcolm Turnbull’s alleged prior knowledge of the email before it was published in the press. Some commentators have suggested these matters are a welcome distraction from decisions about the economy.
Whatever the case in Canberra, we can be pretty good ourselves at avoiding difficult decisions. Guilt can accompany indecision but unless it motivates us to do something, it simply saps our confidence and tends to immobilise us. Aside from those times when we intelligently avoid rushing into a dubious decision, I think we procrastinate because we sense deep down we are not ready to move.
Before we change we often need to experience discomfort with our situation; need to feel we have assessed the risks of making a change; to believe we have a reasonable chance of success, or to know we will be able to cope with an unsuccessful attempt and learn from it. Why else would we move out of the familiar even if it is not ideal.
People change when, and only when they are ready. We cannot make others change. We change when we see the benefits, know how to go about changing, and believe it possible. And we need to do it for ourselves, self-respect. When we choose action on this basis, solid change can occur. Just as removing the chock from under a wheel allows it to gain momentum and speed, so it is the decision which is the most critical part of any change. Once we can reach the decision to change, the previously unthinkable becomes very possible. And in regaining our control over our lives we make those we care about happier, too.
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
Whatever the case in Canberra, we can be pretty good ourselves at avoiding difficult decisions. Guilt can accompany indecision but unless it motivates us to do something, it simply saps our confidence and tends to immobilise us. Aside from those times when we intelligently avoid rushing into a dubious decision, I think we procrastinate because we sense deep down we are not ready to move.
Before we change we often need to experience discomfort with our situation; need to feel we have assessed the risks of making a change; to believe we have a reasonable chance of success, or to know we will be able to cope with an unsuccessful attempt and learn from it. Why else would we move out of the familiar even if it is not ideal.
People change when, and only when they are ready. We cannot make others change. We change when we see the benefits, know how to go about changing, and believe it possible. And we need to do it for ourselves, self-respect. When we choose action on this basis, solid change can occur. Just as removing the chock from under a wheel allows it to gain momentum and speed, so it is the decision which is the most critical part of any change. Once we can reach the decision to change, the previously unthinkable becomes very possible. And in regaining our control over our lives we make those we care about happier, too.
John Hunter BSW (Distinction), MAASW (Accredited), MACA (Clinical)
Medicare Provider of Counselling Melbourne and Burwood East
Mobile 0405 107 476, Ph. (03) 9539 2200, Email: john@johnhunter.net.au
www.johnhunter.net.au
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